🎤 “You Look Like a Horoscope Warning” — Juan Laughs Voice Drop
(Digital Download – MP3)
Juan’s not here to read your chart — he’s here to roast it.
This voice drop hits like a lunar eclipse and a bad Mercury retrograde in one. It’s spiritual satire with a spicy edge, delivered in Juan’s signature deadpan heat.
Perfect for clips, call-outs, meme edits, or just clowning your cosmic crush.
⸻
🔊 Includes:
• MP3 Voice Drop of Juan saying “You look like a horoscope…”
• Digital Artwork of Juan (high-res PNG)
• Instant digital download
• Use it as a reel sound, roast weapon, or audio meme
• Compatible with all devices
⸻
🌀 Vibration Behind the Phrase:
Some folks got Scorpio in their chart.
Some folks are the chart.
Juan’s catchphrase is a roast for the ages — perfect for when someone’s energy feels cursed, chaotic, or just comically predictable. Whether you’re into astrology or not, this line is a cosmic uppercut with comedic precision.
It’s playful. It’s spiritual-adjacent.
It’s Juan, stargazing with a side of slander.
⸻
💡 Part of the “Everybody Gotta Eat” Audio Universe
This ain’t just a soundbite — it’s a worldview.
Juan’s one-liners are made for the spiritually unserious, the roasters of the zodiac, and anyone who’s ever side-eyed a moon rising.
Looking for more? Check out custom roasts, spiritual satire, and the full “Everybody Gotta Eat” comedy multiverse — all cookin’ out the back of the truck.
⸻
🛒 $0.99 — That’s cheaper than a crystal.
Now cue the drop.
And watch their aura flinch. 💫
🎤 “You Look Like a Horoscope Warning” — Juan Laughs Voice Drop
(Digital Download – MP3)
Juan’s not here to read your chart — he’s here to roast it.
This voice drop hits like a lunar eclipse and a bad Mercury retrograde in one. It’s spiritual satire with a spicy edge, delivered in Juan’s signature deadpan heat.
Perfect for clips, call-outs, meme edits, or just clowning your cosmic crush.
⸻
🔊 Includes:
• MP3 Voice Drop of Juan saying “You look like a horoscope…”
• Digital Artwork of Juan (high-res PNG)
• Instant digital download
• Use it as a reel sound, roast weapon, or audio meme
• Compatible with all devices
⸻
🌀 Vibration Behind the Phrase:
Some folks got Scorpio in their chart.
Some folks are the chart.
Juan’s catchphrase is a roast for the ages — perfect for when someone’s energy feels cursed, chaotic, or just comically predictable. Whether you’re into astrology or not, this line is a cosmic uppercut with comedic precision.
It’s playful. It’s spiritual-adjacent.
It’s Juan, stargazing with a side of slander.
⸻
💡 Part of the “Everybody Gotta Eat” Audio Universe
This ain’t just a soundbite — it’s a worldview.
Juan’s one-liners are made for the spiritually unserious, the roasters of the zodiac, and anyone who’s ever side-eyed a moon rising.
Looking for more? Check out custom roasts, spiritual satire, and the full “Everybody Gotta Eat” comedy multiverse — all cookin’ out the back of the truck.
⸻
🛒 $0.99 — That’s cheaper than a crystal.
Now cue the drop.
And watch their aura flinch. 💫
🎤 Click to hear Juan say “You look like a Horoscope Warning”.
